Easter Me

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It happened. 

Blood everywhere. 

Excruciating pain. 

Spikes driven into flesh. 

Gutteral cries. 

Horrific!

Nauseating. 

Totally naked for all to see. 

Standing there, watching all this happen. 

I am overwhelmed. 

He’s suffocating. 

Can’t breathe. 

Bystanders spew forth their filth,

Their utter hatred.

He is helpless,

I am too.

I fall to my knees.

I am broken

Torn up inside

I can’t make sense of this.

His eyes glance at me. 

He’s trying to speak.

What’s He saying?

“Father, forgive them.”

With His final breaths, 

He still shows compassion.

“For they know not what they do.”

Do I know what I am doing?

Am I hearing what I am hearing?

Am I forgiven?

I didn’t drive the spikes into his body.

I didn’t hurl insults at him.

But I did things my way.

My entire life.

Me first.

Him second at best.

I thought it was about duty.

Acting out the rituals.

Keeping the rules.

But he came for something else.

He came for me.

He lived for me.

He is dying for me.

I am told he will rise again, for me.

Love.

This is love?

It seems like a crazy way to show it.

But, in his last moments on this earth,

He shows me something I’ve never seen before.

Love gives long before it gets.

It’s not an emotion,

Although they can follow.

Love is selfless.

I am definitely not that.

But he is.

And, by falling to my knees, 

I see what I never saw before.

His life for mine.

My life for His.

Life is not about me.

All to Him I owe.

Not to earn, but in surrender.

I now see differently.

Now, He lives through me.

No longer I, but Christ through me.

Easter Me

Every moment

Every day

My entire life.

Easter Me!