The Marriage Supper of the Lamb- Part 2

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MW Editor’s Note: This is the conclusion of a wedding sermon given by Mentoring Warriors’ Executive Director, David Riffel. Listen for the parallels between Christ and his Church and a husband with his wife 

Another passage that associates the relational-redemptive marriage between Jesus (the Bridegroom) and the Bride (his church) is Ephesians 5: 25-33.

As I read this, listen to the parallels between Christ and the Church and a husband and his wife.

25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.[a] 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Let’s unpack this beautiful passage.

The call is for husbands to love their wives… now that is a reasonable, noble call.  In a few minutes, you are going to become her husband. Like every man in this congregation who is a husband, you are to love your wife. You are to love her exclusively, like you love no one else.

That love is not based on the conditional standards of this world, where love is skewed to be self-serving.  Verse 25 says our example, our standard, our model for loving our wives is Christ, who loved the church and gave himself up for her.

When you look at the cross, you see how much Jesus loves his redeemed. His sacrifice was for our redemption. He died for us so that (verse 26), he might sanctify us.

To be sanctified is to set us apart. To make us holy. forgiven, redeemed, restored, loved, exclusively his.

As a husband, you are called by God to love your bride by giving yourself up for her. Not in some doormat, self-deprecating way, but in a way that draws her into an intimate, loving relationship with you.

In verse 26, it gives us insight into how Jesus sanctifies us through His Word. As her  husband, bring the Word of God into your marriage. Wash her with the cleansing power of His Word over her soul. 

As I like to say, the Bible has the 100% endorsement of God himself. After all, he ultimately is the one who wrote it. His word is living and active (as it says in Hebrews 4). The Holy Spirit wants to use the Word to penetrate deep, deep, into our souls. The God of the universe has something to say to us and it is always for our good.  Why would we want to miss that?

May your marriage be washed with the Word of God.

[Speaking to the bride], do you know what happens to you when he washes you with the Word? You become…

without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that you might be holy and without blemish.

Yes, in this passage, Paul is talking about the church, but the parallel there is that in a Christ-centered marriage, the wife becomes those same things:  holy, without blemish. No spot, no wrinkle.

I like to say it this way: If I am leading my wife, Sandy, in a Christ-filled way, she should blossom into the woman God has called her to become.

As the husband, love her in such a way that she blossoms as a woman of God.  A holy woman. A woman of depth and grace and love.

The verses I just unpacked refer to Christ and the church, but in this next passage, Paul, the writer of Ephesians, explains the parallel with marriage.

28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body.

Jesus loves us, the church, with the same love he has from his heavenly Father. He loves us as himself. 

What this means is that as husbands, we are to love our wives as ourselves.  Not in some self-gratifying love (which is not love at all), but a love that gives for the benefit and blessing of our wives.

There is something underlying in the passage that few of us realize. I didn’t see it until I was well into our marriage.

The love we have for each other in marriage, husband and wife, is to be Christ’s love that abides in us. In  1 John 4, it says this:

13 By this we know that we abide in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit. 14 And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. 15 Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God. 16 So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.

If you are in Christ, Christ lives his life through you. If you are in Christ, his love is seen in you. Christ loving others through you.

As her husband, as you walk, abide, and dwell in a conversational intimacy with Jesus, your love for her will be rooted in Christ’s love for you.  

As his wife, as you walk, abide, dwell in a conversational intimacy with Jesus, your love for he will be rooted in Christ’s love for you.

It will be Christ-loving through you to each other.

That, my friends, is a life-altering way to view not only our faith, but marriage as well!

Wrapping up Ephesians 5, there are a few more verses to unpack.  This next one, verse 31, finds its roots back to the beginning, in Genesis.  

Ephesians 5:31 goes like this. 

31 “Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

At a recent Mentoring Warriors Boot Camp Weekend, we were discussing this verse with a group of men. I borrowed an umbrella, opened it, and stood under it. 

The umbrella represented the authority and protection of the family I was raised in.  When I married Sandy, I stepped out from under their umbrella, leaving my father and mother, and Sandy doing the same. Through the covenant of marriage, Sandy and I created a new umbrella. A new authority, A new family. A new home. Under God. 

Today, in a few minutes, you are officially stepping out from under your parents’ umbrellas. The vows you are about to say to each other and God show your intent to create a new umbrella, a new authority, a new family, a new home.  ALL UNDER THE SOVEREIGN AND SUPREME AUTHORITY OF ALMIGHTY GOD. The very one we worship today.

In leaving your parents, it is to be done in an honouring way. Just a few verses later in Ephesians, we read 

“Honor your father and mother” (this is the first commandment with a promise), 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.”

Leaving mom and dad happens in many ways, but the underlying thing all of us need to remember is that it is not just a leaving but also a letting go. 

Value your parents’ love and wisdom. They aren’t perfect, nor are you, but by the grace of God, you two, creating your new home, can be a sign of spiritual maturity on everyone’s part. 

The other part of that verse on leaving is cleaving, or holding fast.

Of the young guys I mentor, the part of that verse they love is the very end. “Becoming one flesh”.

I will say this with grace and decorum. The physical intimacy the two of you will share is a good and glorious expression of your oneness with each other. God celebrates such oneness in marriage. 

Be fruitful and multiply!

As I close, I want to finish with one more thought from the passage in Ephesians 5

33 let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

As her husband, she needs, longs for, and desires your love. So, love her richly, deeply, sacrificially.  NOT out of your own strength, but out of your intimate abiding in Jesus.

Love your wife until death do you part.

As his wife, your husband needs, longs for, and desires your respect. In a biblical context, respect in marriage involves recognizing and valuing his unique individual worth, encouraging his growth, and honouring God’s design for the relationship. It’s about treating him with kindness, courtesy, and respect, even in disagreements, and acknowledging his role and authority within the marriage. 

By respecting him, that does NOT mean you do not love him. You do, for true respect comes out of your abiding love with Jesus.

That brings us back to the larger story we are a part of. 

The Marriage Supper of the Lamb is coming!  It will be a glorious day! An eternally significant day!  And anyone here who has/is trusting in Christ for their salvation is invited to that Marriage Supper.

We exalt Jesus, who is our wonderful Saviour and our amazing bridegroom.

And in light of who he is and we, the redeemed, who are his bride, we celebrate today, the beautiful wedding of this wonderful couple.

Amen.