Beyond Mustaches

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When you meet someone, how intently do you look at them? Are your eyes meeting theirs, or do you look away as you talk? It might be a good conversation, but you never truly look at each other face-to-face.

Sometimes, a lack of eye contact infers shame, insecurities, and fear of rejection. There is something about the eyes that is a window into the soul. 

When Paul wrote the the Jesus followers in Thessalonika, he longed to see them, face to face. We have friends in Africa that we haven’t seen in years. Recently, we made a trek to see them. It was a joyful reunion to see them face to face!

Here’s what Paul says…

6 But now that Timothy has come to us from you, and has brought us the good news of your faith and love and reported that you always remember us kindly and long to see us, as we long to see you— 7 for this reason, brothers, in all our distress and affliction we have been comforted about you through your faith. 8 For now we live, if you are standing fast in the Lord. 9 For what thanksgiving can we return to God for you, for all the joy that we feel for your sake before our God, 10 as we pray most earnestly night and day that we may see you face to face and supply what is lacking in your faith?

There is something to be said about being in one another’s presence, where you can physically embrace each other. Our hearing goes up, our attention increases and we can become laser-focused on what each other is saying. More importantly, we can experience a deeper level of soul-to-soul bonds in Christ. 

The question is, how observant are you of others? 

Here’s a humorous example.

Back when I was 16, the pubescent peach fuzz on my lip was darkening into the makings of a mustache. I hadn’t learned how to shave, so I let it grow. One day, in our living room, my twelve-year-old sister commented to my mom about “David’s mustache”. 

To which my mom responded, “David doesn’t have a mustache!”  She was sitting next to me on the couch. Looking over she saw my upper lip and shouted “You do have a mustache!  When did that happen?”

Answer. “When you were not looking!”

Photo from https://www.momjunction.com/

You can be around someone day in and out and not actually see them. I’m talking beyond noticing mustaches and beards and longer hair that weren’t there before. 

In the Bible, face-to-face involves nearness. Yes, physically, but also soul to soul. You pick up on each other’s details and soul conditions. At Mentoring Warriors, we champion growing in deeper levels of relationships:

• Discovery
• Authentic
• Transparent
• Vulnerable

Whenever you meet up with someone, seek to move the needle towards the deeper levels of knowing each other. Granted, only some people you meet will want to go deeper, but in following Christ, the Spirit wants you to grow in deeper face-to-face relationships. That’s at the heart of God, who knows us intimately and loves us unconditionally. 

There are times when a young man I am mentoring has something bottled up inside. Something that is churning and burning them up. Unhealthy behaviors are coming out. Relapses and setbacks tell the story that something is wrong.

He might text a cryptic message of pain. Or, if his heart is truly hanging on by a thread, he will be forthright and ask, “Can we meet up soon?”

When Paul met the believers in Thessaloniki, he looked into their eyes, and listened. He watched their faces, filled with joy and grief.  He placed his hands on them. Prayed over them, He affirmed and exhorted them. Those face-to-face encounters changed their lives. Not because of Paul, but because the Spirit had Paul as an instrument of peace. 

Meeting face-to-face may push you out of your comfort zone; for which I am glad. 

Be comfortable with being uncomfortable. 

Let face-to-face push both of you into deeper, more vulnerable levels of knowing each other. Be willing to reciprocate a level of vulnerability that in the end builds each other up; not dig deeper holes of discouragement and despair. 

It’s easy to hide behind texts and emails. Be the one to suggest a face to face. Notice them. Compliment them where appropriate. Listen deeply and leave that encounter in such a way that both of you feel better known and loved.

Warrior On!