Faith Identity

In Search of a Godly Man-Part 3

So far, we have found six of the thirteen qualities of a godly man. The question lurking beneath the surface is Are you a Godly Man?  Here’s the deal. Either you are moving towards godliness or you aren’t. Either you are making strides, with God’s help, or you are stagnant on your own agenda and making a convoluted mess of things. As we look to the next three qualities of a godly man, take stock of your life. 

To recap, here is the scorecard from the last post. 

Scoring Legend

0=This godly characteristic is non-existent

5=I’m seeing some evidence of this godly characteristic, but I have a way to go. I’m hopeful.

10=Not that I’m perfect but this quality is definitely evident in me. 

Quality #7 Respect

The way of a fool is right in his own eyes,

    but a wise man listens to advice. Proverbs 12:15 ESV

There is a strong correlation between wisdom and respect. When I am fixed on my own ways, I think I am right in every situation. Pride rules me such that when someone offers me advice I snub them off. Usually, that sends one down a perilous path. Things backfire, finding oneself in a worst situation than when you began.

However, when you value wisdom, you listen to advice. In fact, you respect those who offer it.  Respect is to consider someone in high regard. You value them and their opinions. They could have legitimate authority over you, such as a teacher, coach, or employer. Or, it could be a family member or someone in your church that you consider wise. When they speak, you listen.

Listening Well

Ever listen, but what you hear is going in one ear and out the other? Teenage guys are notorious for that with their parents. The rolling of the eyes is not listening! It is disrespectful. To listen well is to physically face the person as they speak. To track with your eyes, perhaps take notes. When they are done, repeat back to them in summary, how you might take their advice and run with it.

Follow through

As a mentor, I’d hope that those I pour into respect me. Not that I expect them to do everything I say, but it would be nice to get some feedback, hear how they handled a situation, and know that perhaps something I said was beneficial. 

Honor your leaders and consider the advice of the experienced. 

Quality #8-Courage

for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 

2 Timothy 1:7 ESV

Courage. Truth be known, I was a super shy kid growing up. You know, the kid that stood behind his dad’s pant leg! Middle school wasn’t that much better. Trying to stand up to the school bullies only got my mouth cut when they slammed my head against a locker. Some guys grow up learning how to defend themselves. Every guy who follows Jesus needs a level of self-defense underscored with a large dose of courage.  

Courage is the Opposite of Fear

We are told in scripture to not fear man, but to lean into God who is our ever-present help in times of trouble. Courage faces anxiety with intent and only fears a future of regret. If you are a follower of Jesus, you have the Holy Spirit living in you. When you live by the Spirit, it’s not that conflicts disappear but that in the midst of them you speak with boldness and courage that you otherwise would not have. 

I’ve learned the hard way. There are times I regret not speaking up or taking a stand. But, there are more times I stand with courage and in doing so, I act like a man. I realize it is Christ in me that is my courage.

Quality #9- Gratitude

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

James 1:17 ESV

Most of us guys in North America are so spoiled, that we don’t even have a clue how good we have it. We complain our latte is too flat, or that the air-conditioner went down and we had to sleep in the heat. We get a spot on our favorite shirt and we are so frustrated we order another one. We decide our 65-inch TV isn’t big enough, so we get a 90-inch display. Our car is only 4 years old and we think we need to get the newest model. We complain and we grumble and then we wonder why God seems distant.

Haves and Have nots

I’m not going to run down that thought trail. We’ve all heard our parents telling us to eat our food because of all of the starving kids in Africa or some far-off place.  It’s true, but come on, the reality is we who claim to love Jesus are so ungrateful and spoiled because we do not see the direct link between what we have as being straight from the hand of God.

But I bought it with my hard-earned money

Sure you did!  And where exactly did the talent come from to have that job and earn a paycheck? Do we honestly think what we have, whether material possessions or quality of health and life and relationships is all our doing?  It’s when I think it’s all by my hands that I become this ungrateful, miserable dude. 

Read that verse from James 1:17 again. EVERY good gift is from God. Your girlfriend, or if married, your wife. Your kids, Your walk with Jesus. Your salvation. A godly man will speak grateful words.  

Catch us for the final (Part 4) in our search for the godly man.

Warrior On!

David Riffel is the Founder and Executive Director of Having gone through his warrior years (18-30) essentially without a mentor, God has placed in him a heart for warriors, to come alongside them in various ways as they figure out life. David’s newly released book, Mentoring Warriors: Coming Alongside Young Men 18-30, outlines principles for mentoring and gives advice for warriors in six key areas of life: self-management, life skills, education/career, relationships, faith, and identity.

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